What Would Happen If I Named My Kid...Bebel

Bebel. A bossa nova musician.

I seriously did not know till yesterday that there were a bunch of musician Gilbertos...Joao, Bebel, and Astrud, I thought those were all just one person.

I didn't know, they all sounded kind of androgynous to me, and it was just a different nickname that this one slick yet random Brazilian artist surnamed Gilberto decided to use faintly related to the way the Artist formerly known as Prince went through several name changes.

What Would Happen If I Named My Kid...Putobongbong?

Putobongbong is Filipino dish.

I've been told many a time that Tagalog is a really bouncy language, but I imagine my kid somehow looking like a goofy-arse Shane Battier.

I don't know how he'd look like, but I hope such a weird ass name would make em a tougher man with a permanent drool coming from his mouth after years of teeth gritting and anxiety.

I think I'd change his (most likely, I would never put my lil princess daughter thru that) last name to something American to something like Harris, just for effect. Putobongbong Harris. Like he was some kind of NFL wide receiver.

Getting saddled with a name like Putobongbong would be the ultimate trap of a name, given that he would probably be nicknamed Spanish "Puto" or the Yiddish "Putz".